Home Alone Reloaded

Episode 24

NEXT MORNING. I was sitting down with Samuel, we were busy clearing the bushes that surrounds everywhere. Though today is Friday, we want all the bushes to get cleared before Saturday so that on Saturday, we will be free.

Me: clearing bushes Samuel, how yesterday be na?

Samuel: baba, yesterday own no be here o.

Me: I swear, you score three points?

Samuel: yes na, that girl bad oo. Na the time wey the party don hot, na him she throw me for ground come climb me without any pity or remorse, but I swear, that girl tight well well.

Me: aya, na me and aunty Jenny wey run parole o.

Samuel: Jesu!! No wonder una two go enter inside her bedroom, I been dey observe say I dey hear shout but my mind no go there o.

Me: haa, I scatter her womanhood yesterday o.

Samuel: ah baba, I trust you na.

Me: wait, after the party how you use enter house?

Samuel: baba, I…..

Me: wait, why you too like to dey call me baba self?

Samuel: whispered Because na you be baba, when it comes to bleeping now.

Me: mtcheew, you don high. Talk better thing jare.

Samuel: ok, so as I was saying, I sneak enter inside our house o, sheybi na around three wey the party finish?

Me: yes, three to four.

Samuel: I just sneak enter inside our house, mum and dad dey sleep. Without wasting time I baff quietly and go straight to bed.

Me: even me too na same thing I do, as I see say them still dey sleep when I sneak in, I just baff before I enter bed. You know say Jennifer been dey beg me make I sleep for her house?

Samuel: haa, but that one no go dey possible naw.

Me: see me see wahala o, the babe just dey beg say make I sleep o.

Samuel: but your mum go quarrel you in the morning naw.

Me: exactly the point..
I said as I dropped the cutlass, took a little broom and started sweeping the grasses that have been cut.

Me: she no know say I commot, when she wake up in the morning no come see me for house dat one na double wahala o.

Samuel: yes, before I forget, today na Friday so who you go like to visit?

Me: I no understand.

Samuel: Bella or Mrs Fatima.