Read Story: SEASON 1 EPISODE 6
So I stand for bridge dey wait for bus abi car, in fact
anything wey fit just come. If you dey Abuja and you
no get car, you go understand wetin I dey yan. Na so
you go wait for bus stop make you enter car, you go
see half of the population of Nigeria dey wait with
you. If car mistakenly stop eh, na blow, punch, bite
and push them dey carry enter the car. Na so the
thing just be me. Kai… It wasn’t funny and still isn’t
wallahi.
I stood there for a very long time, maybe because I
was reasoning who the guy who had picked the call
is. Now, you know that feeling of you nearly getting
something, something special, then you discover
that someone else has it and even has no value for
it. The feeling of emptiness. That was exactly how I
felt.
“Masaka _ Ado, N150. No change!!! If you give me
five hundred, I no go return your money.”
I heard a voice screaming. I was lost in thoughts. I
lifted my head and saw Abuja Molue (Yes, you read it
right. Abuja has molue. Green in colour. Very old
and rickety and those guy? Hold-up doesn’t hold
them as cars clear from their way. Who would want
to brush body with a rusting car? Even if na them
brush you, them go rake about their constitutional
right till the point wey you go just forgive them)
coming to a halt. As expected, masses rushed
towards the car. Me? Kai, I was in the forefront of
the struggle. I no wan hear say this car leave me. If I
don’t get in, I will spend N200 but if I succeed enter,
I go buy Plantain Chips for N50. I be economist.
I had picked a seat close to the window (my best seat
during any car ride) and had settled down. People
were still trooping in.
“Move a little please”
I heard a voice say to me. Lol, I was 2going so was
oblivious of my surrounding. I adjusted a little, the
owner of the voice sat down. The voice was feminine
o but I did not look up, not until half of the person’s
a’r’se rested on my lap, I had to adjust. D–n!! That
a’r’se was soft. I looked up and saw a girl trying to
bring out her phone from her bag. The side of her
face was beautiful and I could see she was
dimpledified (una understand na). I swallowed a
little bit and waited for her to lift her face up
completely. She did and whola, her lips were as thick
as mama iyabo’s kpomo. Her bosom were so huge it
was pressing against the seat in front of us.
The devil got me thinking. Yes, put the blame of
every misdeed on the devil. I wanted to feel those
bosom. The ar’s’e had created its own effect, now is
time for me to create mine. I saw she was adjusting,
(the journey was yet to begin) looking
uncomfortable. I was there to comfort her.
“You can seat by the window while I seat there.”
Yeah, only half of her ar’s’e was occupying the seat.
“Thank you.”
She stood up while I came out from the seat. She
entered and sat down comfortably leaving only a
little portion for me. Thank God men have small
nyashes and what they lack in nyash, they have in
preeks (some men which I am lucky to be part of).
“Everybody don siddon? Oya driver, make we dey go”
Me? Siddon? Mba!!! I was wedged in-between two fat
people, a sumptious lady by my left and an obese
man by my right. I was f’u’cked.
“are you comfortable?”
The kpomo lips sporting babe asked.
“Yes, very comfortable.”
I replied. You can see the contortion of my face
from a mile. You will know I am being choked.
“Sorry eh.”
She said and placed her hand on my laps. Hmmm…
Signal!! Signal!!
“No problem.”
I could not even 2go again. I just abandoned it,
plugged my ear-piece into my ears and started
listening to Eminem’s “I’m a Soldier”. I am a great
fan of Eminem from childhood but if I hear say I fit
rap follow some of im raps.
As the journey started, she leaned and placed her
head on her hand on the front seat. Her bosom
stared at me without protection. The fatman was
already nodding his head while my di’c’k was doing
residential evil (the awakening). I acted like I wanted
to scratch my chest, arched my elbow and brushed it
on her gigantic b’o’o’bs lightly.
There was no bleeping reaction!! Memories came
flooding back. (TRAVAILS OF A MALE SECRETARY)
As I looked at the brea’ast, left one in particular
staring at me, na so my heart pick up rhythm. I just
dey look the bosom as e dey shake anytime wey the
driver wan accelerate or decelerate. Na so I just dey
imagine how the bosom go feel like. My elbow just
rest lightly on the bosom. Light for inside bus dey
off and other passengers ma just dey look dia front.
I decided to make firm my elbow which I used in
tugging at her bosom a little bit to see the reaction.
Lovely comedy